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Whores No Longer in this House, Officials Say

 

THIS HOUSE —

 

Top two officials at the department of Wet Ass Pussy (WAP) confirmed Friday that “the whores that were in this house are no longer in this house.”

 

Belcalis M. Almánzar, the acting secretary of WAP, and Megan J. R. Pete, her deputy at the sprawling agency have confirmed that the whores have vacated this house. 

 

“I’m not sure where they went, but they are not longer in this house,” Almánzar said.“We can confirm that no bucket or mop is needed at this time.”

 

Reporters were immediately suspicious of her claims of knowing where the whores went. 

 

“Whores can go to another house okay? They move around. Next question,” Pete said. 

 

The whores couldn’t be reached for comment.

 

By: Jesse Arnholz

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