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Trump Signs Executive Order Mandating All Executive Orders Sign Themselves

 

On Saturday, August eighth, President Donald Trump signed orders to extend unemployment benefits, suspend payroll taxes, and offer federal eviction and student loan relief. Not too long after, Trump signed an executive order mandating that executive orders are to sign themselves, henceforth.

 

“I noticed that I am signing an awful lot of these and think it is about time that they start pulling their weight around here, this is America, afterall!”

 

President Trump was correct in his statement that the country in which he stood was The United States of America, however, he was incorrect in whatever line of thinking brought him to a place where he thought an inanimate pile of papers could pick up a pen and “sign themselves.”

 

When asked how he planned on accomplishing such a task he said, “we’ll get our best and brightest scientists on it at once.”

 

Ahh yes, because our best and brightest scientists aren’t busy at the moment. Point Donald.

 

By: Joe McNaney

 

 

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